What is AlAnon and Alateen?
Nearly everyone is aware of the organization, Alcoholics Anonymous. Its treatment methods are used in almost 75% of all rehab centers. Fewer people are aware that Alcoholics Anonymous popularized the self-help model of support and treatment for addiction. And, that has extended away from individuals with a substance use problem and to their immediate friends and family members. Al-Anon and its sister-group, AlaTeen, are support groups for the family members of those with a substance use problem.
That’s important, because living with or around someone with a substance use disorder is traumatic. Even if your loved one doesn’t change their personality or how they talk to you, dealing with substance use disorder is trauma. You are literally watching someone you love be ripped away from you by a disorder. And, in most cases, alcoholism pushes people into manipulative, bullying, and abusive behavior that can cause significant harm. The idea of groups like Al-Anon are that you can get support, share your problems with your peers, and build each other up.
What is Al-Anon About?
Al-Anon is a self-help group with two primary goals. To help educate the friends and family affected by alcohol use disorder, and to offer support and sharing for those family members. In some cases, sharing extends to offering fundraisers, places to stay, and ways out of staying with someone with an alcohol use disorder. In most cases, it will mean talking about your problems, sharing experiences, and listening to others.
Education
Most group meetings are themed around a specific topic or question. For example, a group leader might set a topic, offer information, and keep everyone on topic throughout.
- Questions – A group member asks a question, and the group tries to solve it
- Learning – Learning about a specific, pre-selected topic
- Experts – An expert comes in to share information
- Discussing Options – People discuss options in situations, such as your loved one becoming aggressive – so that everyone is aware of them
- Reading Material – You receive or distribute reading material and discuss it
Education can be incredibly valuable. It can help you to understand what your loved one is going through. It can give you insight into what you or a loved one is going through. It can help you to make better choices. And, it can give you the tools to respond to your situation in a way you might want. You won’t always have something to learn but being there also allows you to contribute and to participate.
Sharing
Sharing is the primary point of attending a self-help meeting like Al-Anon. Here, you contribute with stories, experiences, and questions. You also contribute by listening, by making people feel heard, and by helping people to solve problems when they ask.
- Non-judgmental listening
- Sharing your experiences
- Realizing you’re not alone
- Understanding your own behavior and reactions
- Assessing how bad your situation is
- Getting insight from a third party
- A safe space (non-judgmental and private)
The idea is that you get an outlet to share in. That outlet should allow you to find some emotional release. It should also give you guidance, insight, and aid in decision-making. And, it should help you to feel less alone, because living with an addict is extremely common. Millions of Americans do it, and you can go talk to them.
In some cases, Al-Anon will extent to volunteer groups helping to split childcare, transit costs, or similar. It can also involve help moving into shelters, finding new places to stay, getting recommendations to psychiatrists, and similar aid. Not all Al-Anon groups offer this. However, you can get assistance, even if it’s “only” in the form of someone to listen to you and someone to help you get insight into your situation.
What Happens in Al-Anon Meetings?
Al-Anon meetings are diverse. You should set expectations based on the listed meeting type. In fact, most members can only attend specific types of meetings.
In addition, most meetings are 1-2 hours long. However, almost none have official end times. That means you can discuss things until they are closed.
Group meetings always start with an introduction. This includes reading the introduction of the Al-Anon meeting. A round of introductions or a role call goes around (this is not obligatory). You might be asked or given the option to read from the book. However, you can choose to sit and stay silence if you prefer. From there, what happens in the meeting will depend on what type of meeting you’re attending.
Al-Anon uses 9 different meeting structures.
- Beginners – This is where you start. It offers introductory information and welcome to newcomers. You will attend these meetings until you decide to stay and until you’re welcome to other meetings.
- Regular – A topic is set before the meeting, usually at the end of the previous meeting, and you can choose to attend based on that. The topic is discussed by everyone.
- Open – Guests can speak. In some cases, topics are open, and people can bring up whatever they want to talk about.
- Closed – These meetings are only open to members. These are often used to ensure safe spaces for individuals.
- AlaTeen – Regular and Closed meetings for teenagers, with topics centering on teen needs
- Al-Alon Adult and Teen – Meetings for parents with young children, especially those trying to care for children with a co-parent who is an alcoholic.
- LGBT – Topics specifically center on problems, difficulties, and complexities surrounding LGBT needs – with support for either you or your loved one being LGBT.
- Problem Solving – Community members put forth problems which are solved by the community during the meeting
- Topic – A topic is set before the meeting and everyone is asked to stay on that topic.
You might also be invited to other meeting formats. These include tradition, literature, slogans, 12-steps, Men’s, Women’s, and Parents. In most cases, these meetings follow the “regular” format but with specific topics or member requirements.
What’s the Difference Between Al-Anon and Alateen?
Al-Anon and Alateen are run by Al-Anon Family Groups. Both are almost exactly the same and most are held in the same buildings – sometimes even in the same rooms. The difference is that Alateen is only open to teenagers. If you’re between the ages of 12 and 19, you can join. Otherwise, you’ll have to join the older family group. Alateen sometimes allows younger members. Normally, younger members are asked to attend family sessions or to stay with someone volunteering to babysit during the period.
Alateen is designed to offer teens a safe space – where they can vent, share with their peers, and get help – without parental influence or knowledge. That’s important, especially in circumstances where teens might have good reasons not to trust parents or not to be honest around them. E.g., it could be incredibly hurtful to you.
Eventually, groups like Al-Anon and their sub-groups, Alateen, give you the opportunity to meet with your peers, to share with them, and to learn from each other. They offer support, emotional outlets, and non-judgmental insight. And, that can be very good for your mental health as you navigate a family member having an alcohol use disorder.
If you have any questions about our drug and alcohol rehab programs, contact us today to speak in complete confidence with one of our experienced and caring addiction treatment team.