No matter what stage in life you are, and no matter what age you are, knowing that a loved one is in emotional and/or physical pain is heart-wrenching. It is particularly bad when there is a feeling that you cannot help them or you do not even know how to help them. This is particularly true when it comes to the child/parent relationship. In conventional wisdom, it is usually the parent that has to help the child, to teach them to grow up and be happy and healthy. It is usually the parent that is worried about the child, even if they are grown and adults on their own, it is usually the parent doing most of the worrying. However, what happens when it is the parent that needs the help because they are in trouble and going through a rough time. Many times it can be awkward for the child to approach the parent and point out a problem. This is no more important if the situation involves the parent abusing drugs or alcohol. The child has to ask the question, “Is your parent an alcoholic?” And once that question is asked, something should be done to help.
Many of the first responses to an alcoholic parent are for the child to blame themselves. But they have to remember that in most circumstances the excess drinking is not the child’s fault. Most alcoholics become alcoholics due to many reasons that have multiple causes. Also, as a child, do not believe that you are alone, the only person facing this problem. In the United States, approximately 18 million people suffer from some form of alcohol abuse disorder. Alcohol is clearly the most abused substance in America. It can destroy a person’s life, family, and career. Alcoholism can cause people to have to go to jail for many years. It can even kill, either the alcoholic or a family member or even strangers, especially when it comes to DUI related deaths.
Some of the effects on a family, however, does not have to be so drastic. Even if the alcoholic parent is what is considered a “functioning “alcoholic” (meaning that they can mostly function as a normal human being despite the alcohol) and that there is no violence or criminal activity, often times the children in that family can feel unloved and that the parent is emotionally distant. Children of alcoholic parents can grow up bitterness and anger and self-esteem issues themselves.
The signs that children should look for when determining if their parent is an alcoholic are many and varied:
- Moods swings
- Lack of memory of the night/day before
- Making drinking a priority over other responsibilities
- Drinking by oneself or hiding their drinking
- Being visibly drunk several times a week
- Lack of willingness to be with friends and family
- Waking up many times a week feeling sick with a hangover
If you are a child and you see several of these symptoms in your mother or father over many days and weeks, then there may be a problem. The best course of action is to ask for help, help from other family members, adults and specially trained, professional addiction specialists.
The supervised detoxification and residential treatment programs at Asana Recovery are offered in a supportive, relaxing, and inspiring environment. We’re deeply committed to ensuring your long-term recovery and guiding you on your path to a healthier and happier future. There is no better time than now, and we’re always available to speak with you. Call us at (949) 438-4504 to learn more about our comprehensive drug and alcohol addiction treatment program today.
