Where are you supposed to draw the line when you are dealing with your adult child suffering from alcoholism or drug addiction? This is a question parents across the United States (and the world, for that matter) ask on a daily basis as they struggle to cope with one of their children, now grown, who is struggling through a severe case of this mental illness. What should you do? After all, you have been a caregiver to this person for their entire young life (perhaps you still are). You have kept them safe. You have made them happy and done everything to make sure they achieve happiness on their own. So what are you supposed to do when that world is crumbling around them? You want to help, but, in any case, there is a fine line that should never be crossed into the worst case scenario: enabling. Let’s take a closer look at this unfortunate situation and see what you can do if you fit into this situation.
What is Enabling?
First of all, you need to ask yourself this question: do I enable my child?
Overall, enabling occurs when someone fixes problems for other people in a manner that interferes with growth and development. In other words, enablers spoil their children to a dangerous degree. For example, if a grown son purchased a new car and could not pay his rent for the next couple of months, the parent would step in to pay that bill, taking away all manner of responsibility.
How to Help without Enabling
So why are adult children suffering from addiction who are dependent on their parents permitted to get into this sticky situation in the first place? Simply put, the parents have allowed it to happen. This incident can stem from parents being overprotective or being fueled by an endless desire to feel needed or loved. Consider these questions:
- Does the adult child act entitled and make huge demands?
- Are you a constant crutch for your adult child during an endless string of problems?
- Do you make too many sacrifices?
- Do you fear the idea of causing harm to your child?
- Do you feel exhausted?
Overall, never be an adversary to your child. Be a welcoming friend and try to provide support. However, you must never “overdo” it. Remain steadfast and friendly, but remember that you are the parent. You have the right to say the word “no.”
Always remember that mind-altering drugs and alcohol do not have control over your life. You do. Are you suffering from a substance use disorder or a severe form of addiction? Do you have a friend or family member suffering from one or more of these debilitating illnesses? If you do, get in touch with Asana Recovery today. Our counselors and healthcare experts are ready to walk you through every step of the detox and withdrawal process and rehabilitation and guide you towards living a happier, healthier, and freer lifestyle. While the road to recovery might not be an easy road to travel, we promise to help you every step of the way. Take the first step to stay fit, healthy, and safe.
The time for you to take back control of your life is now. If you are interested in one of our residential treatment or supervised detoxification/withdrawal programs, we are ready and waiting to speak with you at your disclosure. Call Asana now at (949) 438-4504 to learn how to overcome your drug abuse, alcohol abuse, or addiction troubles today.
